Karate

Zac's having his fifth karate lesson and I'm out here waiting for him. He still wants us to go into class with him fearing that we would leave him here himself. But he's enjoying his lesson heaps though.

A junior from convent named Esther just arrived Dubai to join her husband here. I'm so happy to know someone from my hometown. At least there are stuff that we can relate to. Common friends, familiar places to talk about and similar lifestyle growing up in JB. Have yet to meet her yet, but I'm sure we will soon. She's just in the next suburb too.

Life has been tiring as usual. Dave brought us down to Al Ain and we stayed in the Hilton hotel resort, visited the zoo and went up to Jebel Hafeet. The zoo is pretty amazing. Well kept and we could spot most of the animals on display. The time away was a very good one. We played on the water slide in the resort and we also had good Japanese food there. All in all it was a very good getaway.

I'm looking forward to our next holiday.

Down...

Nearly mid August now. Feeling rather down in the dumps at the moment. August is meant to be a good month usually, but this month, it's exceptionally gloomy.

Sis will be having a procedure at the end of the month and I pray that everything goes smoothly and she'll recover in no time. 

As for me, loads of rubbish clouding my mind. It's like I'm in a middle of a storm and the wind is blowing hard. All I can see ahead is darkness and I can hardly keep my eyes open because of the rain and wind. Behind, there's a fierce animal chasing me forcing me to keep running regardless of my circumstances. Ahead, there's the end of a cliff where it's a dead end. I'm getting panic attacks but I just have to bite the bullet and keep running forward. I reach the end of the cliff and the animal corners me. Question now is, to jump or not to jump?

A weird imagery of what I'm going through now, but that's exactly how I feel at the moment.

Dave got me some roses which did brighten up my day abit. I hope this storm passes soon. In the mean time, ill hang in there and not jump.

In total darkness

Laying in bed, unable to fall asleep, I've decided to blog. 

It's close to three months now being here in Dubai. The biggest question I have for myself and Dave is, are we happy here?

Upon arrival, Zac managed to go to school for a couple of weeks to keep him occupied and entertained, while I was able to sort out the new life here with Dave busy at work everyday. A routine was established and things were manageable for a while, until the school holidays started.

Before the school holidays started, I researched summer camps and all for Zac to attend so that he will not become a hermit at home with me. Secured a place for him, but come the first day of it, 

Zac had separation anxiety and wouldn't attend it unless I was in the class with him. I persevered for a couple of days but to no avail. I concluded that I've been too anxious for Zac to fit in too quickly without considering how he felt. New environment, new country, new people and all. He misses his friends and also Norway itself. I should have been more sensitive to his little heart...

Staying home with me and running out of activity ideas, we decided to try some shorter classes so he can interact with other kids and have some fun. We tried karate. Zac enjoyed his classes, but the uncertainty is still there and he expects us to be in the class with him. Hopefully he breaks out of this soon.

We also managed to enroll him in swimming classes which he enjoy heaps. That's really a relief. Now he is so eager to attend swimming lessons that it makes me so happy...because at least we found something he really enjoys. It's a joy watching him swim. 

Is Zac happy? The question can yet be answered because every now and again he still says that he misses his friends in Norway and he wants to go back.

Dave wakes up at 6am everyday to prepare for work and gets home about 5ish 6 everyday. Whenever I see him waking up so early, I feel really sorry for him that he can't sleep in longer. He has lots to learn at work, so that is a consolation for me plus he mentioned that McDermott is a good company to work for. Weekends, he tries to take Zac and I out to do stuff. He is a really brilliant husband in that he provides for us very well and we live I would say quite a comfortable life without much to worry about. The big question of whether Dave is happy or not here...from my observations, I don't think he is that happy being here. Given a choice, he would prefer to stay back in Norway or live in Europe.

For me, life is pretty hectic at the moment with Zac being on school holidays. Dubai is a huge city and to get from one place to the other, you'll drive at least 30 minutes. Sunday to Thursday, he's got swimming lessons. Anytime during the week he can attend karate too. Everyday, it's a driving feat of getting Zac on time for stuff. Apart from that, the household chores like washing and cooking and cleaning need to be completed daily. Before Zac had lessons, I had to think of things to do with him at home to keep him entertained too. Life can get pretty hectic like that. Similar to this blog, my life is pretty much a mess at the moment.  There's no fixed routine for doing things and everything is impromptu. Until Zac goes back to school, I believe that the topsy turvy life will stay. 

People might get me wrong thinking that I don't like spending time with Zac. On the contrary, I love being home with him and spending time with him one on one. The closeness that I have with Zac is something I have now which I may never have gotten if I didn't give up my career more than a year ago. It is something I will never exchange anything with. The bond I have with him now is so strong and I cherish every moment I have with him. Why do I keep talking about wanting him to go to school though people might ask. Zac staying at home with me might be good for our bonding, but not so much his social skills. I prefer him to mix around with his peers more rather than 24/7 with his old mum at home. I prefer him to learn together with his peers new things and embark on different things in his life that he might otherwise not be able to being home with me. I prefer him to release all his pent up energy running and climbing and playing with his peers in a friendly environment. I just love him to bits that I want the best for him. Zac going to school also means that I will have a little bit of time to recharge myself too before giving my all to him and also hubby afterwards. 

As it is 123am in the morning, my mind is all over the place and same with this blog entry. To answer the question of whether I'm happy here, my answer at the moment is a direct and definite NO. I will blog more about the life here in my next blog...

Good night...